Today is my birthday
Celebrate my life with you
And remember the good times
Forget the bad.
Look up towards the sun
And catch every ray of light
Upon your cheek.
For I am there with you.

Today is my birthday,
Be happy for me.
My life was full.
I had the pleasure of love
And the joy of my family.
Do not be sad
Look up towards the stars
And catch each twinkle
In your heart.
For I am there with you

Today is my birthday
My legacy is not wealth
Or mighty belongings,
My legacy is you and your life.
Spend it wisely and carefully,
Guard it always.
Do not be sad.
Feel the wind on your face
And in your hair
And know that I loved you
For I am there with you in your laughter
And in your hearts.

Today is my birthday,
Learn to live again without me.
Take my strength with you
For you are not alone.
Do not be sad
Feel the rain on your face
Feel all life's treasures and
Know that you are alive!
At each step of the way
I will help you
For I am with you always
Until we meet again.
Today is my birthday...

I carry your heart with me

(I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it
(anywhere I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate
(for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world
(for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

Keep my memory with you, For memories never die;
I will be there with you, When you look across the sky.
I will be there in the clouds, In the birds that fill the air;
In the beauty of a fragrant rose, You will find my memory there.
You will feel me in the tenderness, Of a tiny baby's touch;
You will hear me if you listen, In the twilight's gentle hush.
When your hearts are heavy, And you feel that you are alone;
Just reach down deep inside of you, For your heart is now my home.
I will always be with you, I will never go away;
For I will live on in your hearts, Forever and a day.

"Love is stronger than death even though it can't stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries it can't separate people from love. It can't take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death."

Anonymous

Some day I will soar with the angels
What a beautiful day that will be
To look at the sky and see rainbows
Coming from heaven for me

Some day I will soar with the angels
Pain will at last finally cease
You will take me away from this sorrow
To a place full of beauty and peace

Some day I will soar with the angels
My tears will be all washed away
Sunshine and blue skies will greet me
And you will be with me each day

Some day I will soar with the angels
No longer will life hold this grief
A magical place, known as heaven
Will erase this terrible thief

Some day I will soar with the angels
My spirit will then be set free
To soar with my beautiful angel
Together again, you and me

As I take the time to write.

I see parents struggling daily--

Their pain is such a fight.

All of us who have gone on

And left the rest of you behind,

We're all OK, Mom, I promise--

Heaven is beautiful, and God is kind.

You used to tell me that one day

God would call and take you home.

You told me you'd make me strong

So I would stand tall when alone.

But things happen sometimes, Mom,

That do not go with our plans.

I wasn't scared, Mom,

When God held out His hand.

I didn't want to leave you;

I didn't have time to say good-bye;

When the angels said, "Come with us,"

There wasn't time to question why.

I've watched you daily, Mom;

It hurts to see you cry.

I don't want you to be unhappy

Just because we didn't say good-bye.

Tell the others what I'm telling you--

So many parents need to know--

That earth was just a layover;

We had another place to go.

I know you miss me, Mom;

I know your heart was broken in two;

But God really needed me

Because my earthly life was through.

I'm always alongside of you--

I smile and touch your hair.

I whisper, "Mom, I love you."

You just can't see me there.

Tell the parents, Mom, for me

That all of us kids are OK;

God had plans for our lives

When He called us home that day.

I love you, Mom, and I always will;

Remember I'm not far away.

We're going to be together again

When God calls out your name.

(Author Unknown)

If you walked in my shoes
Lived with what I have lived through.
Then you would finally know firsthand
There is no peace from where I stand.

In a world that thinks I'm over it..
Or believes I somehow will forget
There are no words that can express
What I have learned to keep suppressed.

The loss of my child has left me numb
I haven't a clue who I've become
I've learned to mask this pain I hide
To bury it way down deep inside.

Others don't see the tears that flow
They cannot know how I've wished to go.
How each day has been met with grief
And years have brought me no relief.

Imagine lighting a candle for your daughter or son
Living a life where you feel you're shunned.
All you have left are your memories bittersweet,
And tomorrow you wake to another repeat.

So until you have walked within my shoes
Lived with what I have lived through
Do not tell me how to feel...
Do not tell me I should heal.

Lyndie Sorenson
August 2007

No matter how hard I try

No matter how many years go by

No matter how many tears I cry

I still can't say goodbye.
Author Unknown

A Heart of Gold stopped beating,
Two shining eyes at rest.
God broke our hearts to prove
He only takes The Best.
God knows you had to leave us,
But you did not go alone ~
For part of us went with you,
The day He took you Home.
To some you are forgotten,
To others just the past.
But to us who loved and lost you,
Your memory will always last.

His journey's just begun
Life hold so many facets
This earth is only one

Just think of him as resting
From the sorrows and the tears
In a place of warmth and comfort
Where there are no days or years

Think how he must be wishing
That we could know today
How nothing but our sadness
Can really pass away

And think of him as living
In the hearts of those he touched
For nothing loved is ever lost
And he was loved so much.

God gave to us
the most precious of gifts...
A child
and we celebrated
with laughter and tears...
and we all whispered
"What a perfect angel."

And now the day comes
where we still celebrate
with laughter and tears...
and we all whisper
"What a perfect Angel...
who now has his wings."

Right now I'm in a different place,
And though we seem apart,
I'm closer than I ever was...
I'm there inside your heart.
I'm with you when you greet each day
And while the sun shines bright
I'm there to share the sunsets, too...
I'm with you every night.
I'm with you when the times are good,
To share a laugh or two,
And if a tear should start to fall...
I'll still be there for you.
And when that day arrives
That we no longer are apart
I'll smile and hold you close to me...
Forever in my heart.

The moment that I knew you had died,
My heart split in two,
The one side filled with memories,
The other died with you.

I often lay awake at night,
When the world is fast asleep,
And take a walk down memory lane,
With tears upon my cheek.

Remembering you is easy,
I do it every day,
But missing you is a heartache,
That never goes away.

I hold you tightly within my heart,
And there you will remain,
Life has gone on without you,
But it never will be the same.

For those who still have their children,
Treat them with tender care,
You will never know the emptiness,
As when you turn and they are not there.

Don't tell me that you understand,
don't tell me that you know.

Don't tell me that I will survive,
How I will surely grow.

Don't tell me this is just a test,
That I am truly blessed.

That I am chosen for the task,
Apart from all the rest.

Don't come at me with answers
That can only come from me,
Don't tell me how my grief will pass,
That I will soon be free.

Don't stand in pious judgment
Of the bonds I must untie,
Don't tell me how to grieve,
Don't tell me when to cry.
Accept me in my ups and downs,
I need someone to share,
Just hold my hand and let me cry,
And say, "My friend, I care".

I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today
I asked "What makes a Mother?"
And I know I heard Him say.

"A Mother has a baby"
This we know is true
"But God can you be a Mother,
When your baby's not with you?"

"Yes, you can," He replied
With confidence in His voice
"I give many women babies,
When they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for the day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there's no need to stay."

"I just don't understand this God
I want my baby to be here."
He took a deep breath and cleared His throat,
And then I saw the tear.

"I wish I could show you,
What your child is doing today.
If you could see your child's smile,
With all the other children and say...

'We go to Earth to learn our lessons,
Of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much,
I got to come strait here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom,
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My Mommy set me free.

I miss my Mommy oh so much,
But I visit her every day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow's where I lay

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
Mommy don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I'm here.'

"So you see my dear sweet ones,
your children are okay.
Your babies are born here in My home,
And this is where they'll stay.

They'll wait for you with Me,
Until your lesson's through.
And on the day that you come home
they'll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother,
It's the feeling in your heart
it's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start

Though some on earth may not realize,
you are a Mother.
Until their time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day
and know that you are the best one!"

My Mom doesn't know I'm watching her
but I'm watching her just the same.
And I hear each tear fall on her face
at the very mention of my name.
She says it sounds like music to her ears
and can be heard over a crowd.
Oh, I hear each tear fall on her face
when my name is said aloud.
I watch her stumble through each day
as she wishes the day would end.
And I hear each tear fall on her face
as she talks of me to her friends.
But there are few who truly understand.
Oh this I've heard her proclaim.
And I hear each tear fall on her face.
Will my Mom ever be the same?
I know that her smiles light up a sky. But I don't see that smile today.
Oh, but I hear each tear fall on her face.
Her blue skies have turned to gray.
Oh I send to her my warmest hug
with the rays of the morning sun.
Then, I won't hear a tear fall on her face.
For I shall erase them one by one.
Yes, my Mom doesn't know I'm watching her.
But I'm watching her just the same.
And if I hear a tear fall on her face
I'll just softly whisper her name!

~Author~
Kaye Des'Ormeaux
Copyright 2001 Kaye DesâOrmeaux

Dedicated to each Mom who has lived this nightmare

1. Thank you for giving me life, for making my favorite foods, for washing my clothes and doing your best to be sure I was safe. Although I no longer need you to do these things, the love behind the actions lighted my way to the other side.
2. Thank you for your prayers and the thoughts you send my way. They lift my spirit (literally) and propel me to the place where only love dwells.
3. Thank you for your anger at the ways I failed, disappointed or betrayed you. I'm closer to you than you think and have heard your words. They remind me that I didn't live up to who I could be and call me to be more kind, honest, loyal and loving from now on.
4. Thank you for forgiving me for all the ways I couldn't love you, others or myself. I may have left you with feelings of being abandoned. Your effort to heal yourself helps to heal entire family line including grandfathers and fathers who have gone before as well as the children and grandchildren who come after.
5. Thank you for being there as I passed - - holding my hand, telling me that it was okay to go. Thank you for comforting me, for calling in the angels, for singing familiar songs. Or, if I left without sharing a few last moments with you, thank you for understanding that my body could no longer hold my spirit which was ready to fly.
6. Thank you for continuing to express my life. Celebrating my accomplishments with scholarships and foundations, telling stories about me (even if not all of them are true) reminds the world that my life had meaning.
7. Thank you for taking care of my stuff, especially if by leaving abruptly there were no instructions to follow. Thank you for tying up the loose ends left dangling when I moved into my new life.
8. Thank you for honoring our love bond - - by wearing the jewelry I've given you, by keeping my photos with or near you, but, most of all, by living your life to the fullest.
9. Thank you for laughing while remembering our good times together. Your laughter creates the music in heaven.
10. Thank you for celebrating birthdays, anniversaries and Thanksgivings and by remembering all the gifts of our life together.

They say there is a reason. They say that time will heal.
But neither time nor reason will change the way we feel.
For no one know the heartache that lies behind our smiles.
No one knows how many times we've broken down and cried.
We want to tell you something so there won't be any doubt.
You're so wonderful to think of, but so hard to be without.

I know I am still with you in your prayers, your thoughts, your heart.
And though you cannot see me, I will always be a part of life's sweet celebrations
in those times when you reflect on how, though things are different, through our love,
we still connect.
We'll see each other someday when our spirits all are free.
Until then, I am with you because you remember me.

No matter how long we're apart or how many miles seperate us, a very
special part of you is always with me.
So instead of feeling sad because we cant be together right now, Ill just
say I Love you and I'm holding you close here in my heart...Where you
belong...

Mum, please listen to me,
as i take the time to write.
I see parents struggling daily,
Their pain is such a fight...

All of us who've gone
And left the rest of you behind...
We're ok, Mum,i promise
Heaven is beautiful and God is kind.

You used to tell me that one day
God would call and take you home,
you told me you'd make me strong
so i would stand tall when alone.

But thing's happen, Mum
That does not go in our plans,
I wasn't scared Mum,
When God held out his hand.

I didn't want to leave you
I didn't have time to say good-bye,
When the Angels said ''come with us''
There wasn't time to question why.

I've watched you daily, Mum.
It hurts to see you cry
I dont want you to be unhappy'
Just because we didn't get to say good-bye.

Tell others what i'm telling you
So many parents need to know,
That earth was just a layover
We had another place to go.

I know you miss me, Mum
I know your heart was broken in two.
But God really needed me
Because my earthly life was through.

I'm always alongside you...
I smile and touch your hair.
I whisper''Mum, i love you''
You just can't see me there.

I'm the one that gently touches you
On your shoulder when you're sad,
Im happy that you've finally found
God again, and are no longer mad.

Tell the parents, Mum for me
That all of us kids are okay.
God has plans for our lives
When he called us home that day.

I love you, Mum, I always will
And remember i'm not far away
We're going to be together again
When God calls out your name.

In my home there are photos
of a face more precious than gold
and to those who love and lost you
your memory will never grow old

Everyday I look at your photos
at your face so loving and true
no wonder my heart is breaking
losing someone as precious as you

But each day you walk beside me
and when my life is through
I pray that God will take my hand
and lead me straight to you

I arrive late and alone
This evening in June
And the band strikes up
The time-honored tune
Pomp and Circumstance
Resounds through the room
But the uplifting notes
Displace none of my gloom.

I slip into a seat
Far removed from the crowd
As the grads file in
Deservedly proud
I pause for a moment
My head is bowed
But to honor these students
Was something I’d vowed.

They had comforted me
In my hours of need
Since the death of my daughter
At the age of sixteen
Halfway through
Their junior year
They had lost a friend
Whom they held dear.

They take their seats
A hundred-twenty, less one
I regain control
Though my heart weighs a ton.
Speeches begin
They mention her name
Because they’re less one
They won’t be the same.

The school is presented
A gift from the class
Beautiful trees in her honor
Along with a plaque
Proclaiming affections
For a friends who is gone
That they, too, are sad
They’re a hundred-twenty, less one.

My vision’s an ocean
Of blurred red and white
As I try to focus
To see their delight
As they leave the stage
Diplomas in hand
Their parents rejoicing
Beginning to stand.

I cannot move
‘Til it’s over and done
Mortarboards flying
A hundred –twenty, less one.
I quickly slip out
The way that I came
Not wanting to dampen
Their dazzling flames.

My tears run unchecked
I can’t stop them now
I’ve gotten through it
Though I’ll never know how.
My one consolation
This moment in time –
She, too, has graduated
But to heights sublime.
Email: acksov@hotmail.com

The sun will shine
roses bloom, geese fly
throughout the sky
stocks will trade,
the weatherman predict
politicians debate
it'll seem like another day
just a day, same 24 hours
not a special holiday
But to this mother
who will stand at the grave
lifting balloons into the sky
serving angelfood cupcakes
with rainbow icing
coated with tears
fluctuating between emotions:
the grief over death
the celebration over birth
For this mother
it will be yet
another birthday without you.
In Memory of Daniel

Please my angel
Pray for me
Send my prayer
up to the Lord
Watch over me
Wrap your wings around me
Shelter me from
The hurt I feel
Stand by my side
And be my strength
The pain will be kept
At arms length
Your Halo of light
Fills my soul
As long as you are there
I know I'll be fine..
Please my angel
Pray for me
Send my prayer
Up to the Lord
Watch over me....

I see you each time you shed a tear,
I catch it and kiss you, I hope that you know that I'm near.
This place is so beautiful, There's so much to see!
I know that someday you'll be here with me.
The angels were singing when I arrived!
Jesus was there with His arms open wide!
The snow and the rain are just my confetti.
I know you'll be coming and I want to be ready.
When you feel the wind, it's me walking by.
I can run and skip now, I can even fly!
When the blossoms and leaves fall into your hair,
It's me planting kisses, yes, I put them there!
The birds are singing to keep you company,
They're especially for you with love from me.
I know that you miss me and feel so alone,
Until the great day when you finally come home
Please remember as the seasons change from one to another,
I'll always love you. You're my friend and my mother.

Dawn Mitchell 1998/p>

The next place that I go
will be as peaceful and familiar
as a sleepy summer Sunday
and a sweet, untroubled mind.

And yet it won't be anything like any place I've ever been
or seen or dreamed of
in the place I leave behind.

I won't know where I'm going,
and I won't know where I've been
as I tumble through the always
and look back toward the when.

I'll glide beyond the rainbows.
I'll drift above the sky.
I'll fly into the wonder,
without ever wondering why.

I won't remember getting there.
Somehow I'll just arrive.
But I'll know that I belong there
and will feel much more alive
than I have ever felt before.
I will be absolutely free of the things that I held onto
that were holding onto me.

The next place that I go
will be so quiet and so still
that the whispered song of sweet belonging will rise up to fill
the listening sky with joyful silence, and with unheard harmonies
of music made by no one playing,
like a hush upon a breeze.
There will be no room for darkness in that place of living light.
Where an ever-dawning morning pushes back the dying night.
The very air will fill with brilliance, as the brightly shining sun
and the moon and half a million stars are married into one.
The next place that I go
Won't really be a place at all.
There won't be any seasons winter, summer, spring or fall
Nor a Monday,
Nor a Friday,
Nor December,
Nor July.
And the seconds will be standing still
while the hours hurry by.
I will not be a boy
or girl,
a woman
or a man.
I'll simply be just,
simply me.
No worse or better than.
My skin will not be dark or light.
I won't be fat or tall.
The body I once lived in
won't be part of me at all.
I will finally be perfect.
I will be without a flaw.
I will never make one more mistake,
or break the smallest law.
And the me that was impatient,
or was angry or unkind,
will simply be a memory.
The me I left behind.
I will travel empty-handed.
There is not one single thing
I have collected in my life
that I would ever want to bring
except
The love of those who loved me,
and the warmth of those who cared.
The happiness and memories
and magic that we shared.
Though I will know the joy of solitude
I'll never be alone.
I'll be embraced
by all the family and friends
I've ever known.
Although I might not see their faces,
all our hearts will beat as one,
and the circle of our spirits
Will shine brighter than the sun.

Don’t grieve for me, for Now I’m free.
I’m following the path God laid for me.
I took God’s and when I heard the call;
I turned my back and left it all.

I could not stay another day to
laugh, to love, to work or play.
Tasks left undone must stay that way,
I found that place at the close of day.

If my parting has left a void,
then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss.
Ah yea, these things, I too, will miss.

Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My life’s been full, I savored much,
good friends, good times, a loved one’s touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief;
Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief.
Lift up your heart and share with me
God wanted me now,

God set me free.

I am wearing a pair of shoes

They are ugly shoes

Uncomfortable shoes

I hate my shoes

Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.

Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I

Do not think I can take another step.

Yet, I continue to wear them

I get funny looks wearing these shoes

They are looks of sympathy

I can tell in others eyes that they are glad

They are my shoes and not theirs

They never talk about my shoes

To learn how awful my shoes are might

Make them uncomfortable

To truly understand these shoes you must walk

In them

But once you put them on, you can never take them off

I realize that I am not the only one

Who wears these shoes

There are many pairs in the world

Some woman are like me and ache

Daily as they walk in them

Some have learned how to walk in them

So that they don't hurt quite so much

Some have worn the shoes so long

That days will go before they think

About how much they hurt.

No woman deserves to wear these shoes

Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman

These shoes have given me strength

To face anything

They have made me who I am

I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

Author Unknown

"I'll lend you for a little time a child of mine," He said. "For you to love the while he lives and mourn when he is dead,
"It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two or three, "But will you, till I call him back, take care of him for me?

"He'll bring his charms to gladden you, but should his stay be brief, "You'll have his lovely memories, as solace for your grief,
"I cannot promise he will stay, since all from earth return, "But there are lessons taught down there I want this child to learn.

"I've looked the wide world over in my search for teachers true, "And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes I have selected you. "Now will you give him all your love, nor think the labor vain, "Nor hate me when I come to call to take him back again?

I fancied that I heard them say: "Dear Lord, Thy will be done! "For all the joy Thy child shall bring, the risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness; we'll love him while we may, And for happiness we've known forever grateful stay.

"But should the angels call for him much sooner than we'd planned, "We'll brave the bitter grief that comes and try to understand."

2008 was going to great
It was your year to celebrate

With your graduation coming in May
Suddenly it no longer seemed too far away

We were looking forward to you obtaining your degree
Now from this pain we try and flee

The French Laundry was waiting
And all of us were anticipating

Your future to unfold
But now that story will never be told

So I will continue to share stories of you, my son, and the man you would be
A person who lived and loved life that was a hero to me

Some things I'd like to say, But first of all to let you know that I arrived O.K.
I'm writing this from heaven, here I dwell with God above,
here there's no more tears or sadness, here is just eternal love.
Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight,
remember that I'm with you every morning, noon and night.

That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,
God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you.
It's good to have you back again, you were missed while you were gone,
as for your dearest family, they'll be here later on.
I need you here so badly, your part of my big plan,
there's so much that we have to do to help our mortal man."

God gave me a list of things that he wished for me to do,
and foremost on that list was to watch and care for you.
I will be beside you every day and week and year,
and when your sad I'm standing there to wipe away the tear.
And when you lie in bed at night, the day's chores put to flight,
God and I are closest to you in the middle of the night.

When you think of my life on earth and all those loving years,
because your only human they are bound to bring you tears.
But do not be afraid to cry it does relieve the pain,
remember there would be no flowers unless there was some rain.

I wish that I could tell you all what God has planned,
but if I were to tell you, you wouldn't understand.
But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is over,
I am closer to you now, that I ever was before.
And to my many friends, trust God knows what is best,
I'm still not very far from you, I'm just beyond the crest.
There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb,
but together we can do it by taking one day at a time.

It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too,
that as you can give unto the world so the world will give to you.
If you can help somebody who's in sorrow or in pain,
then you can say to God at night my life was not in vain.
And now I am contented that my life it was worthwhile,
knowing as I passed along the way, I made somebody smile.

So if you meet somebody who is down and feeling low,
just lend a hand and pick him up as on your way you go.
When you are walking down the street and you've got me on your mind,
I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind.
And when you feel that gentle breeze or wind upon your face,
that's me giving you a great big hug or just a soft embrace.
And when it's time for you to go from that body to be free,
remember you're not going, your coming here to me.
And I will always love you from that land way up above,
we'll be in touch again soon...
P.S. GOD SENDS HIS LOVE.

When I lost my child, the earth ceased to spin.
The moon will not rise, the tide won’t come in.

The sun insists on having its way,
Blasting its rays and rising each day.

Another day comes, my child is not here;
Another day comes, I live my worst fear.

Each morning I wake with the same painful thought;
Why am I here when my sweet child is not?

All moments that pass, I question this fate;
While other lives carry on, I sit and I wait.

I wait for an answer, for some reason why…
Praying for it to be me that could die.

Through my sorrow and grief, I have made a life choice;
To keep my son’s memory alive and give him a voice.

I share stories of my son, and the man he would be;
A boy who lived life and was a hero to me.

Who would grow up and make the world a better place.
Who would save the seas and the oceans from the human race

When I lost my child, the earth ceased to spin.
But the moon still must rise and the tide must come in.

And since the sun insists on having its way,
I will live in my child’s memory each and every day.

~Kim Turner in memory of Matthew Beard
1/20/85 – 12/29/06

"DEATH LEAVES A HEARTACHE NO ONE CAN HEAL,
LOVE LEAVES A MEMORY NO ONE CAN STEAL"

Last night while I was trying to sleep,
My son's voice I did hear
I opened my eyes and looked around,
But he did not appear.

He said:"Mom you've got to listen,
You've got to understand
God didn't take me from you, mom
He only took my hand.

When I called out in pain that night,
The instant that I died,
He reached down and took my hand,
And pulled me to His side.

He pulled me up and saved me
From the misery and pain.
My body was hurt so badly inside,
I could never be the same.

My search is really over now,
I've found happiness within,
All the answers to my empty dreams
And all that might have been.

I love you all and miss you so,
And I'll always be nearby.
My body's gone forever,
But my spirit will never die!

And so, you must all go on now,
Live one day at a time.
Just understand-
God did not take me from you,
He only took my hand.

Written by Susan R. George Shipman
From her son Timothy

The pain gnaws at my heart constantly..
..reminding me that I lived.
Screaming that you did not.

I only want the pain to end,
to somehow make the screaming stop!

The only thing I've learned this year,
the only thing is this..

It doesn't matter how much or how hard I cry,
YOU'RE NEVER COMING BACK

It doesn't matter how much it hurts
or that each day I pray to die,
YOU'RE NEVER COMING BACK

It doesn't matter what church I attend
or to whom I pray or beg,
YOU'RE NEVER COMING BACK

It doesn't matter how kind I've been to others
and this I did not deserve,
YOU'RE NEVER COMING BACK

So why then should anything matter,
why even bother?
I'm here for life you see
You're gone forever, I'm here alone
You're not coming back to me

I'm stuck here, not eligible for parole
It doesn't "get better", it never "goes away"
The screaming inside will never stop!

MY LIFE SENTENCE,
MY LIFE WITHOUT YOU

If tears could build a stairway and memories were a lane
We would walk right up to heaven to bring you home again. No farewell words were spoken no time to say good bye you were gone before we knew it and only God knows why. Our hearts still ache in saddness and secret tears will flow what it meant to loose you no one will ever know...

I see the countless Christmas Trees
Around the world below
With tiny lights
Like heaven's stars
Reflecting on the snow
The sight is so spectacular

Please wipe away that tear
For I am spending Christmas
With Jesus Christ this year
I hear the many Christmas songs
That people hold so dear
But the sounds of music can't compare
With the Christmas choir up here
I have no words to tell you
The joy their voices bring
For it is beyond description
To hear the angels sing

I know how much you miss me
I see the pain inside your heart
But I am not so far away
We really aren't apart
So be happy for me dear ones
You know I hold you dear
And be glad I'm spending Christmas
With Jesus Christ this year
I send you each a special gift
From my heavenly home above
I send you each a memory of
My undying love
After all "love" is the gift
More precious than pure gold
It was always most important
In the stories Jesus told
Please love and keep each other
As my Father said to do
For I can't count the blessing
Or love he has for each of you

So have a Merry Christmas
And wipe away that tear
Remember I am spending Christmas
With Jesus Christ this year.

A note from the author "Wanda Bencke"

Lysandra Kay Bencke was my
thirteen year old handicapped daughter.
On Christmas day 1997, Lysandra
had a seizure and was in a coma for five
days before she passed away.
During those five days I wrote
"Christmas in Heaven".

I still hear the songs
I still see the lights
I still feel your love
on cold wintery nights

I still share your hopes
and all of your cares
I'll even remind you
to please say your prayers

I just want to tell you
you still make me proud
You stand head and shoulders
above all the crowd

Keep trying each moment
to stay in His grace
I came here before you
to help set your place

You don't have to be
perfect all of the time
He forgives you the slip
If you continue the climb

To my family and friends
please be thankful today
I'm still close beside you
in a new special way

I love you all dearly
now don't share a tear
Cause I'm spending my
Christmas with Jesus this year

It is just another New Year
With all the same old pain
It is just another New year
With everything the same

It is just another New Year
To spend here without you
It is just another New Year
Where others have no clue

It is just another New Year
Wishing for your smile
It is just another New Year
To live here in denial

It is just another New Year
To feel this heartache
It is just another New Year
Living on so fake

It is just another New Year
To continue asking why
It is just another New Year
To sit alone and cry

It is just another New Year
To live with this deep grief
It is just another New Year
Living with this thief

It is just another New Year
Just another day
It is just another New Year
To feel so betrayed

It is just another New Year
Living in the past
It is just another New Year
knowing., all of this will last

In loving memory of Joey and his heavenly buddies
Lyndie
© January 1, 2008

You can shed tears that he is gone
or you can smile that he has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that he'll come back
or you can open your eyes and see all he's left.

Your heart can be empty because you can't see him or
You can be full of the love you shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember him and only that he's gone
or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
or you can do what he'd want : smile, open your eyes love and go on.

When one thing dies all things
die together, and must live again
in a different way.
When one thing is missing,
and must be found again
in a new whole
and everything wants to be complete.
Everything wants to go home
and the geese traveling south
are like the shadow of my breath
flying into the darkness
on great heart-beats
to an unknown land where I belong.

If I planted a flower each time I thought of you
I could walk forever in my garden
Author unknown

I loved you before you were born
I loved you while I held you in my arms
I love you since your birth back to Heaven
I will love you for all eternity.
Author unknown

I said, "God, I hurt."
And God said, "I know."
I said, "God, I cry a lot."
And God said, "That's why I gave you tears."
I said, "God, I am so depressed."
And God said, "That is why I gave you Sunshine."
I said, "God, Life is so hard."
And God said, "That is why I gave you Loved Ones."
I said, "God, my Loved One died."
And God said, "So did mine."
I said, "God, it is such a loss."
And God said, "I saw mine nailed to a cross."
I said, "God, but your Loved One lives."
And God said, "So does yours."
I said, "God, where is he now?"
And God said, "Mine is on my right and yours is in the Light."
I said, "God, it hurts."
And God said, "I know..."

Friends may think we have forgotten
When at times they see us smile.
Little do they know the heartache
That our smile hides all the while.
Beautiful memories are wonderful things
They last till the longest day.
They never wear out, they never get lost,
And can never be given away.
To some you may be forgotten,
To others, a part of the past,
But to those who loved you and lost you,
Your memory will always last.

Author Unknown

You asked, "How am I doing?"
As I told you, tears came to my eyes...
        and you looked away and quickly began to talk again.
All the attention you had given me drained away.

"How am I doing?" I do better when people listen,
        though I may shed a tear or two.
This pain is indescribable.
If you've never known it you cannot fully understand.
         Yet I need you.
                 When you look away,
                         When I'm ignored,
                                 I am again alone with it
Your attention means more than you can ever know.

Really, tears are not a bad sign, you know!
         They're nature's way of helping me to heal...
         They relieve some of the stress of sadness.

I know you fear that asking how I'm doing brings me sadness
         ...but you're wrong.
The memory of my loved one's death will always be with me,
         Only a thought away.
My tears make my pain more visible to you, but you did not
         give me the pain...it was already there.

When I cry, could it be that you feel helpless, not knowing
         what to do? You are not helpless,
And you don't need to do a thing but be there.
When I feel your permission to allow my tears to flow,
         you've helped me
You need not speak. Your silence as I cry is all I need.
         Be patient...do not fear.

Listening with your heart to "how I am doing"
         relieves the pain,
         for when the tears can freely come and go, I feel lighter.

Talking to you releases what I've been wanting to say aloud,
         clearing space
                 for a touch of joy in my life.

I'll cry for a minute or two...
         and then I'll wipe my eyes,
                 and sometimes you'll even find I'm laughing later.

When I hold back the tears, my throat grows tight,
         my chest aches, my stomach knots...
                 because I'm trying to protect you from my tears.
Then we both hurt...me, because my pain is held inside,
         a shield against our closeness...and you,
                 because suddenly we're distant.

                        So please, take my hand and see me through my tears...
                                then we can be close again.

In a quiet country cemetery,
Where the gentle breezes blow,
Lies my son I love so dearly;
He died a few years ago.

His resting place I visit,
Placing flowers there with care,
But no one knows my heartache,
When I turn to leave them there.

Though his smile is gone forever,
And his hands I cannot touch,
Still I have so many memories
Of the son I loved so much.

His memory is in my keepsake,
with which I will never part.
God has him in His keeping;
I have him in my heart.

~ Author Unknown ~

I'm still here,though you don't see.
I'm right by your side each night and day.And within your heart I Long to stay.
My body is gone but I'm always near. I'm everything you feel,see or hear.
My spirit is free,but I'll never depart As long as you keep me alive in your heart.
I'll never wander out of your sight-I'm the brightest star on a summer night.
I'll never be beyond your reach. I'm the warm moist sand when you're at the beach.
I'm the colorful leaves when fall comes around And pure white snow that blankets the ground.
I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're fond. The clear cool water in a quiet pond.
I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring,The first warm raindrop that April will bring.
I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine,And you'll see that face in the moon is mine.
When you start thinking there's no one to love you,You can talk to me through the Lord above you.
I'll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees And you'll feel my presence in the summer breeze.
I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep, And the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep.
I'm the smile you see on a baby's face,Just look for me MOM,I'm everyplace!

Go ahead and mention my child
the one that died you know.

Don't worry about hurting me further,
the depth of my pain doesn't show.

Don't worry about making me cry,
I'm already crying inside.

Help me to heal by releasing,
the tears that I try to hide.

I'm hurting when you just keep silent,
pretending she didn't exist.

I'd rather you mention my child,
knowing she has been missed.

You asked me how I was doing,
I say "Pretty Good" or "Fine"

But healing is something ongoing,
I feel it will take a lifetime.

Written by
Elizabeth Dent

On the day God took you
I thought that I would die
I wondered where the time went?
I asked alot of whys??
With people all around me
I felt alone inside
From all their words of comfort,
I couldn't seem to hide,
I thought I might be dreaming
That I'd wake and find you here,
I thought "This can't be happening."
As I wiped another tear.
On the day that you were laid to rest
My heart broke yet again,
I wondered if the pain would end,
But mostly, I wondered when??
It's hard to be without you,
At times the days seem long,
Sometimes I just sit crying,
When there's really nothing wrong.
I wish we'd had more time,
Before your life was done.
I hope your resting peacefully,
My precious one

My mom is a survivor,
or so I've heard it said.
But I can hear her crying
when all others are in bed.
I watch her lay awake at night.
and go to hold her hand.
She doesn't know I'm with her
to help her understand.
But like the sands upon a beach
that never wash away...
I watch over my surviving mom
who thinks of me each day.
She wears a smile for others,
a smile of disguise.
But through Heaven's open door,
I see tears flowing from her eyes.
My mom tries to cope with my death,
to keep my memory alive.
But anyone who knows her
knows it's her way to survive.
As I watch over my surviving mom
through Heaven's open door...
I try to tell her that
Angel protect me forevermore.
I know that doesn't help her,
or ease the burdens she bears.
So if you get a chance, call to her
And show her that you care.
For no matter what she feels,
my surviving mom has a broken heart
that time won't ever heal.
~K. D'Ormeaux

I am writting to you from heaven, and though it might appear.
A rather strange idea, I see everything from here.
I just popped in to visit, your stores to find a card.
A card of love for my mother, as this day for her is hard.

There must be some mistake I thought, Every card you could imagine.
Except I could not fine a card, from a child who lives in heaven.
She is still a mother too, no matter were i reside.
I had to leave, she understands, but oh the tears she's cried.

I thought that if I wrote you, that you would come to know,
That though I live in heaven know, I still love my mother so.
She talks with me, she dreams with me, we still share laughter too.
Memories our way of speaking know, could you see what you could do.

My mother she carries me in her heart, her tears she hides from sight.
She writes poems to honour me, sometimes far into the night.
She plants flowers in my garden, there my living memory dwells.
She writes to other grieving parents, trying to ease their pain as well.

So you see Mr Hallmark, though I no longer live on earth.
I must find a way, to remind her of her wondrous worth.
She needs to be honored, and remembered too.
Just as the children, on earth will do.

Thankyou Mr Hallmark, I know you,ll do your best.
I have done all I can do. to you I,ll leave the rest.
Find a way to tell her, how much she means to me.
Untill I can do it for myself, when she joins me in eternity.


Author Unknown

I know that you mean well
But you don’t understand
There are no words to explain.
Although on the surface, I may appear fine,
Remember I buried a child of mine
And there is no greater pain.

Grief is taboo in our civilized world,
I despise this hideous game,
I must smile while going insane.
For God’s sake, part of me died,
You can’t imagine how many times I cried,
And there is no greater pain.

If I look well,
Or laugh when you joke,
You think that I am my old self again.
I’m raw inside a shell of me,
The woman you knew can no longer be,
And there is no greater pain.

Look deep in my eyes,
Acknowledge my loss,
As my heart beats its hollow refrain.
I am caught in a web of infinite whys,
I’ll mourn for my son until the rest of me dies,
And there is no greater pain.

Madelaine Perri Kasden
Written in loving memory of her son,
Neill Perri, 10/2/71 – 6/15/95

Mom, please listen to me
As I take time to write
I see parents struggling daily
Their pain is such a fight.

All of us who have gone on
And left the rest of you behind
We're ok, Mom, I promise
Heaven is beautiful, and God is kind.

You used to tell me that one day
God would call and take you home
You told me you'd make me strong
So I would stand tall when alone.

But things happen sometimes, Mom
That does not go in our plans
I wasn't scared, Mom
When God held out his hand.

I didn't want to leave you
I didn't have time to say goodbye
When the angels said, "Come with us"
There wasn't time to question why.

I've watched you daily, Mom
It hurts to see you cry
I don't want you to be unhappy
Just because we didn't get to say goodbye.

Tell the others what I'm telling you
So many parents need to know
That Earth was just a layover
We had another place to go.

I know you miss me, Mom
I know your heart was broken in two
But God really needed me
Because my earthly life was through.

I'm always alongside you
I smile and touch your hair
I whisper "Mom, I love you"
You just can't see me there.

I'm the one who gently touches you
On your shoulder when you're sad
I'm happy now that you finally found
God again, and are no longer mad.

Tell the parents, Mom for me
that all of us kids are okay
God had plans for our lives
When he called us home that day.

I love you, Mom, I always will
And remember I'm not far away
We're going to be together
When God calls out your name.


~ Author Unknown ~

Submitted to Alive Alone by Ronnie Clark
Author unknown

Dear Mom & Dad,

I know that this is a rough time for you. So I will be as gentle as I can be.
First of all, thank you for so many tears, particularly those shared with
another that you love. They are a gift to me, a precious tribute to your
investment in me.

As you do your mourning, do it at your pace only. Don’t let anybody suggest
that you do your grief work on their timetable. Do whatever it takes to fact
directly the reality of what has happened even thought you may need to pause
frequently to yearn for my return. Do this with courage and my blessings. Know
that sometimes inertia is the only movement possible.

Give your best to keeping balance between remembering me and renewing your
commitments to life. It’s OK with mw if you go through minutes, hours, and even
days not thinking about me. Loosening me and grabbing hold of a new meaning is
a delicate art. I’m not sure if one comes before the other or not, maybe it’s a
combination.

Be with people who accept you as you are. Mention my name out loud, and if they
don’t make a hasty retreat, they’re probably excellent candidates for
friendship.

If, by remote possibility, you think that there is anything that you could have
done for me and didn’t, I forgive you, as my Lord does. Resentment does not
abide here, only love.

You know how people sometimes ask you how many children you have. Well, I’m
still yours and you are still my parents. Always acknowledge that with
tenderness, unless to do so would fall on insensitive ears and would be painful
to you. I know how you feel inside. To be included as your child honors me.
Read, even though your tears anoint the page. There is an immense library here
and I have a card. In Heri Nowens’ “Out of Solitude,” he writes “The friend who
can be silent with us in a moment of despair and confusion, who can stay with us
in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not healing, and face with
us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”

Mom and Dad, I don’t know where you are spiritually now, but rest assured that
our God is not gone. The still small voice you hear in your heart is His voice.
The warmth that sometimes enfolds you is Him. The tears that tremble just
beneath your heartbeat are Him. He is in you, as I am. I want you both to know
that I am OK. I have sent you messages to ease your pain, they come in the form
of flowers that bloom out of season, birds singing, voices and visions and
sometimes through your friends and even strangers who volunteer as angels. Stay
open but don’t expect the overly dramatic. You will get what you need and it
maybe simply internal peace. You are not crazy, you have been comforted.
Please seek out people bereaved longer than you. They are tellers of truth, and
if they have done their work, are an inspiration and a beacon of hope whose pain
lessened dramatically.

One more piece of wisdom before I close. There are still funny happenings in
our world. It delights me to no end when I hear your spontaneous, uncontrolled
laughter. That, too, will come in due time.
Today, I light a candle for you. Joined with your candle, let their light shine
above the darkness.

two words, so simple,
but when uttered by an emergency room doctor
in the gray of pre-dawn
they send a bolt of pain
through your heart
that tears, rips, and punctures
so brutally that
no
amount
of time
will ever make
that heart the same
again. . .
--Sandy Goodman, 1997